Palace sources insist no mirrors have been broken by King Charles, no-one has tripped over a black cat, and all ladders were safely stowed away while not in use. Also, since the King is both Supreme Governor of the Church of England and Defender of The Faith, it would not be possible for him to either believe in bad luck, or suffer from it.
Instead, either gross stupidity, malice, or quite possibly an artists vision that transcends the tabloid spreading of muck [Editor: What are you trying to say?] may be responsible for Jonathan Yeo’s new portrait of King Charles.
Yeo, who may have had Lady in Red playing on loop while King Charles stood for the portrait has produced a stunning, bold, scarlet depiction of the King whose uniform of the Welsh Guards blends so well into the background it is being considered as a template by the British Ministry of Defence for future camouflage.
The former Prince of Wales once speculated it would be his bad luck to be reincarnated as a Tampax (TM). Sales of Tampax are currently on the rise as more and more males identify as trans women. A spokesbirthingperson for Tampax briefly stopped counting stock options to give a YeeHa.