SNP NEC in Urgent Talks to Elect New Party Leader

Senior SNP leaders convened an urgent meeting of the SNP National Executive Committee last night to choose their next leader after Humza Yousaf resigned unexpectedly. With bridges burning all over Scotland and Bute House aides on high alert with fire extinguishers at the ready after a warning from a BBC reporter that Humza might choose self-immolation rather than continuing on as the continual continuity candidate, the Zombie party sought council from long sitting stalwarts such as John Swinney. The Notional eagerly awaits to see who might be proposed as a competent leader for the party, able to inspire the left, far-right and centerists within the SNP while also building new bridges with the opposition to replace those that have been burned down. We suspect we may be waiting for some time.